I’ll bet you thought my discussion about the Twelve Days was over didn’t you? Not quite. I couldn’t finish the topic without mentioning the parodies of the very popular song.
The website
Has a number of parodies towards the bottom – be sure to check them out, I’m sure you’ll be able to relate to at least one or two of them!
Another parody I quite like is this one, which anyone who buys a turkey for Christmas may relate to. Of course, in this case it seems to be the first day of Christmas is Christmas Eve.
On the first day of Christmas my true love said to me
I'm glad we've bought a turkey and a proper Christmas tree.
I'm glad we've bought a turkey and a proper Christmas tree.
On the second day of Christmas much laughter could be heard
As we tucked into our turkey - a most delicious bird.
As we tucked into our turkey - a most delicious bird.
On the third day of Christmas we'd friends in from next door
The turkey tasted just as good as on the day before.
The turkey tasted just as good as on the day before.
On the fourth day of Christmas Gran came, she's rather old.
We finished up the Christmas pud and ate the turkey cold.
We finished up the Christmas pud and ate the turkey cold.
On the fifth day of Christmas outside the snowflakes flurried
But we were nice and warm inside - we ate the turkey - curried.
But we were nice and warm inside - we ate the turkey - curried.
On the sixth day of Christmas the turkey spirit died.
The children fought and bickered and we ate the turkey - fried.
The children fought and bickered and we ate the turkey - fried.
On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave a wince
When he sat down to dinner and was given turkey mince.
When he sat down to dinner and was given turkey mince.
On the eighth day of Christmas the dog ran off for shelter
I served up turkey pancakes and a glass of Alka Seltzer.
I served up turkey pancakes and a glass of Alka Seltzer.
On the ninth day of Christmas poor Dad began to cry
He said he couldn't stand the strain of eating turkey pie.
He said he couldn't stand the strain of eating turkey pie.
On the tenth day of Christmas the air was rather blue
And everybody grumbled at eating turkey stew.
And everybody grumbled at eating turkey stew.
On the eleventh day of Christmas the Christmas tree was moulting
Mince pies as hard as rock and the turkey quite revolting.
Mince pies as hard as rock and the turkey quite revolting.
On the twelfth day of Christmas at last Dad smacked his lips
The guests had gone, the turkey too - we dined on fish and chips!
The guests had gone, the turkey too - we dined on fish and chips!
Now, back to the song.
In Australia
For example, instead of Santa’s sleigh being pulled by reindeers this far south, it’s pulled by kangaroos, as epitomised in the song, Six White Boomers (a Boomer is a colloquialism being Big White Kangaroo). You can do a search of YouTube to find a few videos created featuring the song.
Likewise, some of the traditional Christmas Carols have been given an Australian bent.
For Jingle Bells Australian style go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1aYkutjXfQ
As would be expected, Australians also have changed the lyrics to the Twelve Days of Christmas. In fact there are a number of versions of this, revolving around different Australian native animals. You should note that one of the versions (which I haven’t included here) has an emu in a gum tree – now that’s just ludicrous, and whoever created that version probably wasn’t an Australian at all because all Australians know that emus are BIG birds that don’t fly, and they certainly don’t climb gum trees! The more popular version is a kookaburra in a gum tree.
Version 1
On the first day of Christmas, my true love sent to me
A kookaburra in a gum tree
On the second day of Christmas, my true love sent to me
Two cockatoos, and a kookaburra in a gum tree
Three parakeets.........
Four great galahs.......
Five opals black......
Six 'roos a-jumping........
Seven emus running.......
Eight koalas clinging.........
Nine wombats waddling........
Ten dingoes dashing.......
Eleven snakes a-sliding.......
Twelve goannas going.......
A kookaburra in a gum tree
On the second day of Christmas, my true love sent to me
Two cockatoos, and a kookaburra in a gum tree
Three parakeets.........
Four great galahs.......
Five opals black......
Six 'roos a-jumping........
Seven emus running.......
Eight koalas clinging.........
Nine wombats waddling........
Ten dingoes dashing.......
Eleven snakes a-sliding.......
Twelve goannas going.......
On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me
Twelve goanna goin, Eleven snakes a-sliding,
Ten dingoes dashing, Nine wombats waddling,
Eight koalas clinging, Seven emus running,
Six 'roos a-jumping, Five opals black,
Four great galahs, Three parakeets,
Two cockatoos, And a kookaburra up a gum tree.
Twelve goanna goin, Eleven snakes a-sliding,
Ten dingoes dashing, Nine wombats waddling,
Eight koalas clinging, Seven emus running,
Six 'roos a-jumping, Five opals black,
Four great galahs, Three parakeets,
Two cockatoos, And a kookaburra up a gum tree.
This is another version:
A kookaburra in a gum tree
2 snakes on skis
3 wet galahs
4 lyrebirds
5 kangaroos
6 sharks a –surfing
7 emus laying
8 dingoes dancing
9 crocs a-snoozing
10 wombats washing
11 lizards leaping
12 possums playing
Now as a born and bred Australian, I’m not overly happy with either of these versions by themselves. Why? Well wombats waddle – I’ve never seen one wash. Snakes don’t ski, but they do slide and we have some of the deadliest snakes in the world, so they should probably be included. Likewise crocs and sharks - yes I know there are sharks worldwide, but sharks and surfing really fits in with the Australian Christmas of being at the beach, so for me it stays! “Lizards” are common in lots of countries and ditto for parakeets. Cockatoos should definitely be included, and I prefer wet galahs to great galahs, because galahs really aren’t that big – they’re just normal bird-sized (certainly not as big as an emu). Emus both lay and run so either of those options I’m happy with. And ‘goanna going’ just sounds lame.
You know, with the modern Australian versions all being so different, is it any wonder that we don’t REALLY know what order things were sung in the original song (see the Wikipedia discussion on the Twelve Days of Christmas – referred to in my previous blog).
Now, in keeping with the YouTube parody I included in my first blog entry about the Twelve Days of Christmas, i.e. the Twelve Pains of Christmas which occurs before Christmas, I thought I would include here an Australian version of what the twelve days might include if they happened before Christmas Day in Australia
On the first day of Christmas a swagman at the gate
Said, Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the second day of Christmas an emu by the fence
Said, Good onya, cob
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the third day of Christmas a shearer down the shed
Said, How ‘bout the flies?
Goon onya, cob
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the fourth day of Christmas a goanna on a rock
Said, ‘it’s stinkin’ hot
How ‘bout the flies
Good onya , cob,
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the fifth day of Christmas Frank put up the sign
Total Fire Ban
Said, ‘it’s stinkin’ hot
How ‘bout the flies
Good onya , cob,
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the sixth day of Christmas a dingo by the dam
Said, I’m flat out till Chrissy
Total Fire Ban
Said, ‘it’s stinkin’ hot
How ‘bout the flies
Good onya , cob,
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the seventh day of Chirstmas Sue put up the lights
Drop in for a chinwag
I’m flat out till Chrissy
Total Fire Ban
Said, ‘it’s stinkin’ hot
How ‘bout the flies
Good onya , cob,
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the 8th day of Christmas they called the CFA
Santa’s on a fire truck
Drop in for a chinwag
I’m flat out till Chrissy
Total Fire Ban
Said, ‘it’s stinkin’ hot
How ‘bout the flies
Good onya , cob,
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the ninth day of Christmas you should have heard the cheer
School’s out for summer!
Santa’s on a fire truck
Drop in for a chinwag
I’m flat out till Chrissy
Total Fire Ban
Said, ‘it’s stinkin’ hot
How ‘bout the flies
Good onya , cob,
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the 10th day of Christmas y’couldn’t move in town
A madhouse up Main Street
School’s out for summer!
School’s out for summer!
Santa’s on a fire truck
Drop in for a chinwag
I’m flat out till Chrissy
Total Fire Ban
Said, ‘it’s stinkin’ hot
How ‘bout the flies
Good onya , cob,
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the eleventh day of Christmas they drew the raffle prize
You little beauty!
Madhouse up Main Street
School’s out for summer!
School’s out for summer!
Santa’s on a fire truck
Drop in for a chinwag
I’m flat out till Chrissy
Total Fire Ban
Said, ‘it’s stinkin’ hot
How ‘bout the flies
Good onya , cob,
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
On the twelfth day of Christmas, we’ll take an early mark
Knock off till New Year
You little beauty!
Madhouse up Main Street
School’s out for summer!
School’s out for summer!
Santa’s on a fire truck
Drop in for a chinwag
I’m flat out till Chrissy
Total Fire Ban
Said, ‘it’s stinkin’ hot
How ‘bout the flies
Good onya, cob,
Have a ripper Aussie Christmas, mate!
If you don’t understand what any of these words mean, feel free to add a comment and I’ll try and elucidate.
Another Australian parody that’s probably just as apt and which I only just discovered doing the research for this blog this year follows below. If you don’t understand it, that’s okay, it’s all about types of alcohol, chiefly Australian beer (with the exception of Saki of course). I have taken the liberty of changing one of the beers represented by the Xs to their proper name – Fourex represented by, you guessed it, XXXX, however Fourex by itself doesn’t fit in perfectly so I’ve altered it to a Fourex Gold……..though with the mention of Gold, perhaps we should make this the number 5 gift!
On the first Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
A blue, foam stubbie holder
On the Second Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Third Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Fourth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Fifth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Sixth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Seventh Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Eigth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Ninth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
9 hours of hangover
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Tenth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
10 tons of aspirin
9 hours of hangover
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Eleventh Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
11 weeks of rehab
10 tons of aspirin
9 hours of hangover
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Twelfth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
12 months to recover,
11 weeks of rehab,
10 tons of aspirin
9 hours of hangover
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
A blue, foam stubbie holder
On the Second Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Third Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Fourth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Fifth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Sixth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Seventh Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Eigth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Ninth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
9 hours of hangover
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Tenth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
10 tons of aspirin
9 hours of hangover
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Eleventh Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
11 weeks of rehab
10 tons of aspirin
9 hours of hangover
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
On the Twelfth Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me,
12 months to recover,
11 weeks of rehab,
10 tons of aspirin
9 hours of hangover
8 A.A. classes
7 pints of saki
6 different six packs
5 giant kegs
4 Fourex Golds
3 Carlton midstrengths
2 VB lights
and a blue foam stubbie holder
Okay, so it wasn’t that great but certainly fits in with the idea of carousing and festivities that used to be so traditional in Olde England
To finish off I thought I’d end with another YouTube video I like, also about beer, but this time its Canadian, so you see, it's not just Australians who are obsessed with beer.
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